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A First Hand Account ~
By Rebecca Blackwell Drake
Mary Smith Dabney Ware
From A New World
Through Old Eyes,
published 1923 by Putnam's Sons
Mary Dabney Meets
Generals Grant, Sherman and McPherson
Of all the families in
Raymond during War times, one of the most effected was that of Augustine
and Elizabeth Dabney. Augustine Dabney was a probate judge and worked
hard to support his wife and ten children. Of the children, three became
soldiers in the Confederate Army. His wife and daughters helped to nurse
the wounded soldiers following the Battle of Raymond. The following is
an account by Mary Dabney [Ware], sixth born, who recalled her journey
to Vicksburg in the days following the battle. During the trip, she met
and visited with the three most prominent officers of the Union Army:
Grant, Sherman and McPherson.
Seeking Supplies in Vicksburg
 "We heard that General Grant was giving
away the wagons and mules driven into Vicksburg from the plantations on
the route of his march. It was decided that Kate Nelson [friend] and I
should go to Vicksburg and obtain transportation from General Grant in
person with a safe conduct from him through the Union lines. One evening
late, just as this decision had been reached, a lady of our
acquaintance, Mrs. McCowan, came over to see me. She had heard that I
wanted to go to Vicksburg. She could furnish a vehicle and a horse and
would willingly take me if my youngest brother, John Davis, could drive
us. She protested, however, that it would not be possible to take Kate,
as there was positively no room for another person."
Arriving at Big Black River Station
"We got off very early next morning. My brother, though quite
young, was an experienced driver, for it was he who made the weekly
trips to Burleigh, my uncle's plantation, for meal, corn and an
occasional piece of fine beef or mutton when the family were there, but
they were at that time refugees in Georgia, and that resource for us had
been cut off. We reached Big Black station about the middle of the day.
There was an important Union garrison at this point. We asked to see the
commanding general who assured me most courteously that our horse, which
need rest very much, should be cared for and that meantime we were
welcome to the hospitality of his tent. Soon after our arrival there, he
invited us to dine with him. To have accepted dinner from a Union
General would have been of course rank disloyalty, perhaps even treason,
to the Confederate cause. We replied with thanks that we had brought our
lunch with us. We partook therefore of this meager and unappetizing cold
meal, while odors of the most alluring nature from that hot dinner came
floating in to us. We were sustained, however, by the thought of our
patriotic devotion to the Confederacy."
Astonished by Women's Lies For
Confederate Cause
"While we were waiting there, women from the surrounding county
began to collect in the tent. They came in all kinds of vehicles and
told us they had come for the weekly rations which General Grant allowed
them. I had not heard before that the Union army was feeding families in
the devastated area. When the General came in from his dinner he said to
the women that he had just received orders from Vicksburg to cease
giving rations, as General Grant had been informed that they were used
to feed Confederate soldiers. The women thereupon cried out as with one
voice that they gave no food to Confederate soldiers, they had to feed
their own children and the children of the Negroes, besides the old
people, they did not have enough to give away, etc., multiplying and
emphasizing these asseverations. Hearing this and fully convinced that a
great wrong was being done these poor women, I turned to the General and
said: "Do you not believe them? I certainly do, and even if you do
not, it would be more humane and more just to give them time to make
other arrangements instead of wasting it to come here for nothing."
"The general then told them that
on his own responsibility he would furnish them rations for that week
only, but that they must not return as he could not possibly disobey
orders. I wish I could remember the name of this dear good man. I was
blinded then by prejudice nor could I have read the hearts of men. As
soon as the General left us to give orders for the rations and was well
out of hearing, the women again with one united voice exclaimed,
"Of course we feed Confederate soldiers! We would share our last
crust of bread with them!" My astonishment was too great for words,
nor should I have known what words to use under the circumstances. It
was a case for casuistry. Were they wrong, believing as they did in the
sacredness of the Confederate cause? Still they lied with too much ease.
I could not get over it. We, in Raymond, had never refused a Confederate
soldier food nor a place at our table. These women then had acted right,
but why couldn't they have said, "Can we refuse food to the hungry?
It would be unchristian," or better still, when to speak is to
confess, why not keep silent? Well I felt that I had gone surety for a
falsehood, and I was aggrieved against the women. But more exciting
events were to follow."
Meeting with General Sherman and
Family
"General Sherman came over from Vicksburg to meet his wife and
daughter who were arriving from Ohio. The two Generals sat and conversed
while waiting for the Sherman ladies. General Sherman's
"stock" cravat worried him. He took it off and was awkwardly
trying to arrange it. I quite naturally held out my hand, took the
cravat, stuck a pin into it and returned it to the General, but no
sooner had I done this than the enormity of my conduct became apparent
to me. It was indeed nothing short of high treason to the Confederate
cause and I believed that if Mrs. McCowan betrayed me to the people of
Raymond I should be ostracized, the finger of scorn leveled at me. I had
henceforth, too, a dreadful secret which I feared to confess even to my
most intimate friends, or to my family. Nor was the Sherman conversation
of a nature to ally my scruples. He said he was persuading General Grant
that the only way to end the war was to burn and devastate the country,
for the men would not remain in the Southern army if they knew their
wives and children were homeless and hungry. He was so intent on
demonstrating to his tenderhearted host the correctness of his theory
that he took no thought of the two silent women on whom his words fell
like the doom of an impending fate."
Shocking News of the Capture of
General John Morgan
The two Generals now went out to meet Mrs. And Miss Sherman. They soon
returned with the ladies. Mrs. Sherman was eager to tell the latest
news, and very important news it was. The two men listened with rapt
attention. The Confederate General [John Hunt] Morgan who had attempted
a raid into Ohio from which the South had expected great results, had
been captured and he and his raiders put into the penitentiary. On
hearing this tragic news, Mrs. McCowan and I began to weep silently and
for fear of attracting attention we slowly moved around till our backs
were pretty well turned to the group of talkers. We mopped the tears
rolling down our cheeks, wrung our noses noiselessly, not daring to use
our handkerchiefs otherwise and were very unhappy. "(Editor's
note: During one of Confederate General John Morgan's raids north of the
Ohio in 1863, he was captured near New Lisbon and imprisoned in the Ohio
State Penitentiary.)
Raymond Women Projected a Picture of
Decaying Fortunes
"We were indeed a picture of the decaying fortunes of our poor
Confederacy. Our hats and clothes looked as though they had come from a
museum of ancient costumes. Mrs. Sherman and her daughter were dressed
in the latest style, hats and traveling costumes in perfect taste and
very "smart." The young lady was still very young, hardly
fully grown. We would have gladly escaped to our vehicle but feared to
call attention to our wretched selves. At length the Sherman party got
off and we were free to depart."
Arriving in Vicksburg and Meeting
General Grant
"When we reached Vicksburg, Mrs. McCowan and I parted, each going
to our respective friends. My brother John Davis and I were received
most hospitably by Mrs. Creasy and her mother, Mrs. Pryor whom we had
often seen at our house in Raymond. Mrs. Creasy promised to take me next
day to General Grant's headquarters. She said she knew one of his staff
very well, Colonel [Harrison] Strong. This officer received us cordially
as an old friend of Mrs. Creasy. We were taken immediately to General
Grant. The General manifested, from the first moment of our interview, a
decided inclination to make a joke of the whole business of the Arkansas
move. Replying to his jests I informed him that we [friend Kate Nelson]
were going to a corner of Arkansas where he and his armies could not
possibly penetrate. He promptly retorted that he intended going right
there. He was inexorable as to allowing any kind of firearms to my
father and brother en route, but was not averse to the safe conduct
through his lines."
Embarrassing John Rawlins, Grant's
Chief of Staff
"After many jokes which I have forgotten for I was only intent on
securing those wagons and mules, he asked me to follow him. At the end
of the corridor he opened the door of a large room where a young man was
at work at a desk. Before addressing him the General asked me in a low
voice if I didn't think the young man was very handsome. I suppose he
was really handsome, but what did that matter to me, to whom he was
simply an enemy of the Confederacy? Not wishing to lose time I replied
carelessly, "I don't think he is as handsome as Colonel
Strong." Of course Colonel Strong's beauty, if he had any, had made
no impression on me, but I said what I did because it seemed at the
moment the best way of disposing of the question of Rawlins' beauty and
of getting down to business, namely to wagons and mules. I had made my
remark in a very low voice but now the General horrified me by calling
out: "Rawlins, this young lady ways you are not as handsome as
Strong." Poor Rawlins, thus exposed to criticism on his personal
appearance before his superior office, got very red in the face. My
fears led me to believe that I had decidedly jeopardized my
transportation prospects and I was far more unhappy than Rawlins could
possibly have been."
Accuses Sherman of Ruthlessness
"But the General ordered him to make out a paper entitling me to
receive two wagons and four mules. When this precious document was safe
in my hands my peace of mind was restored. In spite of deep seated
prejudice I had to acknowledge to myself that General Grant was a very
humane man, and I felt sure he could never commit a cruel act that he
would inevitably err if err it were, on the side of clemency. In
comparing the two men, General Grant and General Sherman, I felt and
still feel sure that General Grant accomplished more by his kind heart
than Sherman by his theory of ruthlessness. The latter [Sherman] took no
thought of the soul of man which is not like that of any other of God's
creatures. Men bend to force, but hatred smolders in their hearts. All
this, however, is only stating in other words the old truth that
Christianity is true statesmanship in dealing with a conquered foe, that
evil cannot be overcome with evil."
A Meeting With General James McPherson
"That evening Mrs. Creasy took me to General McPherson's
headquarters to get from him the order for two more wagons and four more
mules for the Nelson family [Raymond]. Mrs. Creasy agreed with me that
this was better than to ask General Grant for all the transportation. It
occurred to me, however, afterwards, that one of these two Generals
might well have mentioned my mission to the other, and then what would
they have thought of a young woman who sought by deception to acquire
more than a just proportion of the plunder of Southern plantations! This
thought tortured me and I felt sure I could have confided to General
Grant the whole story, and Mrs. Creasy was there to corroborate it, but
it is my fate always to commit mistakes and repent of them when too
late.
"When General McPherson heard my
name, he said, "I read a letter from you to your brother when I was
in charge of the prisoners on Johnson's Island." I said, "You
should not have read a letter not intended for you." "But it
was a duty enjoined on me to read all letters addressed to the
prisoners. I should not have allowed that letter to go through according
to rules, but I do so notwithstanding.
"I remembered the letter very
well. It was a denunciation of the Union army and I am now willing to
believe, both unjust and exaggerated, but my brother Fred told me after
his release that it was a joy to his fellow prisoners when he read it to
them. So, in spite of its faults it served the purpose of cheering those
unfortunate victims who were expiating the folly and iniquity of
mistreating Northern prisoners in Southern camps, the only stigma, I
hope and believe, on the conduct of the war by the South."
McPherson Proves His Point
"General McPherson now took out some letters he had received from
Southern ladies proving how lenient he had been in carrying out his
instructions, how he had sympathized with them in their unmerited
sufferings, privations, etc. He wanted me to read them. Now if there was
one thing I dreaded more than another it was to be asked to read strange
handwriting in public. I was therefore unwilling to make a spectacle of
myself before General McPherson and Mrs. Creasy and got out of it as
best I could be asking him questions. Did he favor turning our slaves
against their masters? Of course he could not discuss such subjects,
certainly not publicly. Why he cared in the least for my conversation is
more than I can tell. I suppose that being in an enemy country he was
deprived of ladies' society. I am very sure that if he had cultivated
women to talk to he would never have listened to me who had been born
and bred in a town smaller than any Northern village; but whenever Mrs.
Creasy would propose to go he would beg her to stay just a little
longer, till that good lady, who took not the slightest interest in our
conversation, got out of all patience and dragged me off."
Embarrassed to Tears
"Next morning, after breakfast, entirely satisfied with my two
orders for transportation to that Arkansian Arcadia, I found in the
parlor a trashy novel which was absorbing my whole attention. Indeed I
was weeping freely over it, for one of my unfortunate characteristics
was the easy flow of tears. At this moment, Mrs. Creasy came hurriedly
into the room calling out that General McPherson was on the front porch
and I must come out instantly. No help in sight for me. I had to go on
that porch, into the clear morning light which revealed pitilessly my
swollen eyes. I was dressed, too, very badly, in a dress spun and woven
in a small farmhouse near Raymond. Of course General McPherson was an
enemy, but there was my wounded vanity whispering, "What a
disillusion for the man who thought you worthy of his conversation and
attentions yesterday evening." The General said, "I have
ridden all over Vicksburg this morning but I can find no harness
anywhere." I had never thought of harness, but now piqued and
mortified, I said: "So your gift was not a real one. You knew I
should not be able to get the wagons and mules to Raymond." Without
appearing to notice this ungrateful and impertinent remark, the General
said gravely, "I think I can give you some good advice. In the
Confederate hospital there are some wounded men most anxious to leave.
Give my order to them and if there is a harness still in Vicksburg they
will find it." He mounded his horse and rode away."
"I believe he was killed soon
afterwards in Tennessee, one of the noblest and most chivalrous men
produced on either side of that war." (Editor's note: General
McPherson was killed July 22, 1864 during the Battle of Atlanta.)
Leaving Vicksburg for Home
"My one desire at that moment was to leave Vicksburg and get home
as soon as possible. Without asking Mrs. Creasy to accompany me I
started off immediately to the Confederate Hospital. There I was brought
before the superintendent, a Northern man. I told him my business in a
few words. He looked at me with what appeared to be withering contempt
and said: "At your age young ladies in the North stay home with
their parents and leave business to men." I really did not need any
more mortification that morning, and this blow overwhelmed me. I handed
him two orders and said I was told to come there. I did not attempt to
justify myself.
"When I reached home I found my
uncle there who had persuaded my father to rent out his Raymond house
and move to Burleigh, my uncle's plantation. The family were refugees
and the slaves too had been taken away, so someone was need to protect
the property. My father was greatly elated by my success in Vicksburg
for the wagons and mules would enable him to cultivate the kitchen
garden and a field at Burleigh with the salves who had not left
us."
Postscript
Mary Dabney married Lt. William
Lynch Ware, a Confederate officer wounded during the Siege of Vicksburg.
Lt. Ware had been wounded in both legs and brought by ambulance to
Raymond where he convalesced briefly in the Dabney home. They were
married a short time later. Following the war the couple moved to
Jackson where they lived for twelve years. Since William Ware passed
away early in the marriage, Mary was left alone with children. She
eventually moved to Europe where she traveled and lived for fourteen
years before returning home. The final chapter in her book A New World
Through Old Eyes is entitled Reminiscences. This chapter, relating
memories of her family and home in Raymond, was written on the ocean
voyage as she returned to America.
*Rare photograph of Mary Dabney Ware
[left] with her younger sister Letitia Dabney Miller taken in the 1900s.
Photo courtesy of Phillip Miller and Thomas Marshall Miller, grandson
and great grandson.
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